How can we let go of the past
The other day I was in Athens. The taxi driver who picked me up from the airport told me of how the Greek are told an important ‘truth’ from childhood, which is: Turkey is the enemy. It made me think: what if our parents told us a different story? Then what would happen?
Based on history and experiences in the past, this ‘truth’ about the relationship between Greece and Turkey gets passed on from generation to generation, leading towards the same…mistrust, fear, defence, separation, power plays, wars etc. This is the same for many other countries.
I asked the Greek taxi driver: What would happen if we would tell every new baby who gets born into the world in Greece and Turkey that they are friends. What would happen? He looked at me as I was suggesting something totally ridiculous. He couldn’t acknowledge how simple a solution for being enemies for hundreds of years could be. By rewriting a story.
Of course it isn’t as simple as that. For the older ones to be able to tell the new-borns a different story, they need to heal their own story first. With all that longs in it to be heard and seen, forgiven and thanked for.
This is ALL we need to do as individuals, to reach peace within ourselves so our stories can let go of us. As WE don’t let go ourselves, but IT leaves us, once it is understood, healed, loved and revealed.
This is the same for collective issues. Like white versus black. My home country the Netherlands took part in rising inequality between people with a different colour of skin. In history The Dutch have colonised parts of the world and used dark skinned people as slaves. This ‘quilt’ is still deeply hidden in the under-stream and an issue in many parts of the world.
We have a tv-personality and member of Parliament in the Netherlands, who is very connected to the Back-lives-matter story. But that hasn’t always been like that. Only since she was told ‘the story’.
She was born in Suriname, when it was still a colony of The Netherlands. She moved towards The Netherlands when she was young. She grew up in a small town with mainly white children around and not having the feeling she was different. Until the day, she got ‘the talk’ (this is exactly how she said it). In which her dad had a conversation with her, making it very clear she would never be treated the same as the white ones. So she better be prepared.
Now she is fighting for her rights, just like all black generations before her. But she never felt she had to, until she was told to…right? When I heard her telling this story in a tv-interview I was so surprised she didn’t realise this herself. She didn’t ask herself, and neither did the interviewer: what if my dad wouldn’t have told me that in this way? What then?
Whose pain is it?
Often we become so occupied with stories which aren’t even ours, without realising it. That’s what children do. Without knowing. Out of loyalty. Out of love. We carry the stories of our parents and unhealed pains which have not been met by generations before us.
So how do we let go and can we help our children when we see them in emotional or physical pain?
We tend to focus on them and what’s wrong with them. But often, or mostly always, we can help them best by uncluttering our own energy field. We need to show up and do our inner work. If, and especially, when we think we don’t need it or we have already done enough. There is always a deeper level of consciousness to gain and the world needs that. So we liberate ourselves and all generations after us and before us.
When we heal ourselves, we heal the whole.
We are in this together.
Let’s get transparent in full connection with what is and what wants to show itself.
Our pains are our medicine.
I bow to your story. Use it wisely, to grow and evolve.
Until it is no longer yours to hold on to.
I will guide you through it in my training The Shaman Within.
Thank you for showing up.
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